Transcript: An Other Chrismast Spesial

Jerry: This is another Christmas specials by Jerry Jackson. I already made another one, but this is another one.

Do you know what day it is, mum and dad?

Jerry's Mum: V E day.

Jerry: No.

Jerry's dad: D Day.

Jerry: No.

Jerry's mum: Jerry, i think it is somewhere between January and September, but I am not rate sure.

Jerry: Mum, you bollocks, and it is Christmas. What have you got me?

Jerry's Mum: Oh, oh is it?

Jerry's Dad: How was I supposed to remember that it was Christmas? There is no one to tell me.

Jerry's Mum: Jerry, me too. I have also been unaware of the fact that it is Christmas.

Jerry's Dad: There was a bit of snow on the Sky Sports logo this morning, and I was well confused I thought it was broken.

Jon: Jerry, don't worry. I have got you a present. Would you like this orange what has bits of sticks and matches and some poo in it?

Jerry: No thank you, Jon. I have already got one and I don't think it's fair that I have more than one.

At my school that I go to, we are not allowed to say it is Christmas because there would be people what don't like Christmas and they would feel left out. So we have to lie and say that we are celebrating the end of the tax year, but at the same time we have always got our tax returns on the back of our minds so we can't really relax.

My friend, Ali, was really pissed off this year because Tesco's was shut on Christmas Day, and he had loads and loads of pennies what he wanted to go and put in the machine, but there the door was blocked up, and he got really, really mad. And he said he threw some of the pennies into a bush, and then like when he stopped being as mad he tried to go and find as many as he could, but I don't think he got them all.

On Christmas Day, it is well easy to rob people's houses cause there is lots of good telly on and they are paying attention.

My dad lets me smoke a cigar when we go out robbing at Christmas.

Jerry's Dad: You only live once.

Jerry: Dad, oh bollocks. I think someone is coming out of the house.

Jerry and his dad: (singing) Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus, Where's that Santa Claus year?

Jerry: Can we have some money for singing?

Man: Of course you can. Have a mince pie and a bottle of wine, and also a carrot for the reindeer.

Jerry: Dad, we should still rob this house cause they're well rich and it is. We can do the carol thing again if they come out.

Jerry's Dad: I have tought you well.

The Christmas Postman: Hello, Jerry. I am the Christmas Postman.

Jerry: What have you got me for my presents?

The Christmas Postman: I have not got you note, but you can have this local paper and some pizza flyers. There is a good one for that new curry place in there what is really good and they are open on Christmas Day.

The End.